Turned Around

Ahhh... I'm so much happier about today.

I did go to Zumba - although my workout was cut in half. The childcare was closing 30 minutes earlier than normal, plus I was 10-15 min late by the time I got to class. ((coughkidscough))

But I did highly enjoy my workout. I must confess I had some Dr. Pepper to give me a little caffeine boost. Either way - the movement and fun upbeat music did really seem to change my day. I'm so glad exercise has this effect on me! I then went to the grocery store and bought the remaining healthy ingredients I needed to make meals and make good choices this week. Plus 1 frozen pizza for lazy emergencies!

I've tracked my day today and am going to stay on track. I'm making kind of a rich dinner - so I might just have a small helping with a large salad - to make the calorie cut for the day.

I didn't do very well this weekend, although it could have been worse. I'm disappointed in myself. I want to see results so much, yet I keep falling into bad overeating habits. I won't reach my goals if I allow myself to do that!

Thanks for listening!

StReSsEd OUT!

I've just had a very stressful morning. Nothing huge in the scheme of things, but I must have been too tired to handle it all. Essentially my daughter missed the bus- or chose not to get on it - because of a stuffed animal. What do you do when your first grader is crying and melting down and won't get on the bus? I'm not really sure what the right answer is... I tried a variety of things. Kindness and love - didn't cut the tears. Threat of punishment - no dice. Anger... well, that never works for anyone. Phone call to daddy... not so much. I knew when I had everyone in the car and she wouldn't let up despite the hugs and stuffed animal, that once we got to school we'd be playing out the same scene. I was just beside myself. So, as to daddy's suggestion - she stayed home but is going to spend most of the day in her room. She can color and read and play with toys - but no electronics. After some cuddle time on the couch.

So - most of this happened before I had breakfast. I had a granola bar(not on my normal menu) when I thought I was still driving her to school. All I want to do is eat to calm myself down. I did make my normal egg breakfast - which usually keeps me on a healthy track for the day.

But I still feel stressed. I want to eat well today -but not really. I want to relieve this stress. And I usually do that with cookies. I feel like they're calling to me today. I have a melon I bought for snacking on... but I just don't have the energy or desire to cut it up. I'm feeling particularly lazy yesterday and today. My plan was to go to Zumba today, but I don't want to. I probably will though, since it will make life easier at home for the kids and me. It's always better when the day is broken up and we get out of the house. I'm not throwing in the towel yet. I need to refocus on my goals and plan out my menu for the day. I need some energy!

Last night Re-cap and Weigh In Day

Well - I managed to hold myself together last night. I never looked at the box of brownies. We had a good dinner - although I could have cared less at that point. We had Yellow Fin Tuna and asparagus. I also made cauliflower but it took to long and no one ate it. I then decided to get to the gym. I knew if I didn't I would end up eating anything in the house and be miserable and frustrated with the kids. There was a step class, which ended up being too easy and low impact for me. I figured this was a "fat burning" workout - since it was a lower intensity. It also fit my mood, I didn't want to do too much but it was nice to be in a class so I wouldn't quit early. I followed the night with a bowl of cereal and three oreos.

So - WI this morning. I was a bit nervous. And apparently it matters a great deal where my scale is. I have a tile floor - and so all the tiles aren't perfectly level. So when I finally got it right, my weight was 205.7 lbs. I was pretty pleased with this! I lost 1 pound this week! Of course, I would have liked more, but considering I was falling off track the past couple days I'm still glad to have a loss. I'll feel better when I lose weight consistantly. Otherwise I know this pound could just come right back on.

I'm also glad I had a loss because mentally I don't think I could keep this up if I wasn't starting to see results.

I don't understand myself....

So I was doing great for most of the week. The weekend was pretty good and then Monday and Tuesday were great as well. Then Wednesday... well - I just stopped trying. I just was hungry and overloaded with stuff to get done. I wanted sugar.

Today, I started out okay - I had a Mops meeting to go to - which always has a bunch of great food. I was only going to get "healthy stuff" with one dessert and 1 casserole... just small bits of the good stuff. Well, there was almost no fruits and veggies or yogurt or anything really healthy. So I ate little bits of all the junk. Including lots of sweets. I had to run an errand before home... and decided I didn't want anything I had at home... so I stopped for some tacos. I tried to make a better choice... but it's still Taco Bell. Now all I want is brownies... maybe because I have a mix in the cubbord and that's the only sweet thing in the house. I finished off the Girl Scout cookies... don't worry - it was only 3 thin mints.

But I'm just so mad. I weighed myself this morning and it was up - just from a not so good day yesterday. And today I just don't want to get back on track. I want to reach my goals and lose weight - but sometimes you just want a break and enjoy something good!

I'm so conflicted. I have this wholesome healthy organic lifestyle I'm trying to lead my family toward ~ and that's fine 80% of the time... but the rest of the time I just want to chuck it all out the window. I want the fast food - but at the same time, that's exactly what I don't want. And I can't seem to control myself the other 20% of the time... It's all or nothing it seems. I'm either eating the healthy way or the old way. My choices are either good or bad. I think I need a "good" way to eat sweets. And as the lady at WW said "I'm a volume eater." She was talking about herself, but I am too. I am not satisfied with one bite. I need the full experience/serving to feel satisfied.

It's so frustrating - I want to reach my gaols - but the hard work really sucks in the mean time. I need to get to the gym. Maybe I'll take the kids with me tonight. I think a good sweat would kick my cravings a bit. Tomorrow is my WI and I don't want to totally blow it. But seriously ~ brownies are calling MY name.

It's the little things...

So - I'm very much looking forward to this week's WI. It's pretty much the first week I've been serious about my diet and exercise. Not that I haven't been trying... but I haven't been tracking or changing my workout much- or at least not enough.

What I've changed is the little things... and I'm hoping they add up. Normally these little things don't even to seem worth the effort - but of course, I'm hoping they are! My workouts, for example. If I couldn't get the highest calorie burn, it wasn't worth my time. Then I realized that my motivation was lacking - and starting Zumba again was better than skipping my workout all together. Other things I've done is added some light exercise to my evening routine. I was doing Wii fit, but now that's evolved into dragging my step upstairs and doing that for a half hour each night. I'm even doing lunges and squats off of it. I've also added some Pilate's into the routine. After I get home from the gym - when the babe is asleep I'll do a Pilate's bun/thighs video. I might even try it during my evening tv time - I'll just set up our portable dvd player and put it on mute.

Diet wise - I'm tracking alot better. I'm figuring out the correct portion size of things I thought I was able to judge on my own. Like oil in my morning eggs & spinach. Today - I also improved my McD's visit even more! I normally will get a Caesar salad w/ grilled chicken and use balsamic vinaigrette. It's pretty good and not too shabby on calories. Well - today I got two side salads and brought my own mixture of nuts/seeds and dried cranberries. The side salads are only 20 calories on their own - I didn't even use a whole packet of dressing. I didn't miss the processed chicken or the shredded cheese covered in powder preservatives. yuck!

So I'm hoping all these small changes will keep adding up. I have my goals in the forefront of my mind. Seems everything I do makes me think of Disney - how we can save money to go, or like to today at McD's - how we'll be stopping at a few of these on our drive down to Disney...

Just have to say...

I am SOOOO in the groove! I could have done better this weekend, but really - I think I did pretty good for me! We ate out several times, but I made healthier choices. Sure - I could have made even better choices, but let's be real - I'm eating out for a reason!!!

I have weighed myself everyday, and I was thrilled to see neither day did I go up in weight. Today, I made some great choices. I skipped the muffin at church, I had salad and roasted turkey and grilled veggies for lunch, then salad with a small portion of spaghetti for dinner. I've only had 2 Girl Scout cookies - and then cereal for my evening snack. This is a great day for me! Plus I did some step while watching a movie this evening.

I'm going to rock this week's weigh in... I got this!!

Meal Planning

Meal planning is probably the easiest way to make a diet work. It's easy to sabotage any diet, but meal planning is probably the best way to set yourself up for success!

So today I went to the grocery store with my husband in tow. I must say - I have a great husband. He's very open to eating healthy foods and eating less meat. He's also very open and aware that I need to be supported in this weight loss venture. We had lunch at the grocery store - they have quite the spread of foods available. He wanted Chinese - but asked me first if that would dissuade me from getting the salad I already planned to get. I told him I'd be fine. Today, anyways.

So we went shopping. It was our splurge week - to stock up on items. I don't know that I stocked up on anything, but I bought just about any item I thought I might need for meals this week. It's hard to stock up on fruits and veggies.

So the meals for this week also include a change in lunch plans for my husband and daughter. They will be eating turkey wraps instead of sandwiches. I bought extra salad fixings for me. I also plan on making White Chicken Chili. I'm not sure if we'll have this for a meal, because I like to freeze the leftovers in individual portions for lunches. I'd like a fair amount of lunches!

I'm actually not clear on the dinners. We bought wild caught tuna - and then I have plenty of chicken. I have asparagus I can roast and I made riced cauliflower to make a stir fry.

It's interesting because we used to plan our meals around meat. Now they're planned around veggies. If I could just get my snackign under control - then I'd really start dropping pounds!