So, I finally uploaded pictures from this summer. And there were a few of me, imagine that!! Noone takes my picture - which is mostly okay, because the few I see, I don't like very much at all.
I've been picking up cues that I'm in denial about my weight - which makes it easy to slack off. If there's nothing wrong, why work so hard to change it?! right? Well, I'm seeing some signs that I've ignored the truth. Sigh...
1. I avoid my picture being taken. Not intentionally, or so I *think.* But when I think about me in pictures - I used to remember my great smile. Everyone always used to say how photogenic I was. And in a way, I think I still am. But when I remember the recent pictures of me - I'm not too happy. I look awful!!! Blah! I'm shocked with how I look. I'll post some more recent pics soon.
2. I avoid the scale. And I'm reading in other weight loss blogs how that might be playing into the whole denial thing. I thought it was a good thing to not be obsessive. Maybe not as good as I thought! (It wouldn't hurt for me to be a bit more concerned about my calorie intake!)
3. Kinda goes with #1, My personal mental image of myself is pre-babies. My clothes tell me otherwise. But I'm surprised when I'm confronted with this truth. Maybe because I normally just look at my face in the mirror, I forget and deny that I'm actually 50 pounds heavier.
4. I can't remember!! I thought there was at least 1 more!
So, I uploaded these picture. And now I'm getting ready to get some professional pictures taken this weekend. I'm definitely going to have to go shopping!!! And I'm mad at myself that I haven't done more to loose weight in this time. Sigh... Okay - I guess they don't look THAT bad... I had some other ones, but I was with other people and I wasn't sure if they would want to be pictured in my blog. At the time of these pictures, I wasn't dieting very well, but I was exercising alot. So I feel I've slipped from this a bit as well. I've softened up a bit!
The minute I stop weighing myself daily is when I have decide to ignore the fact that I am gaining weight - when I am losing I love to weight myself, but its tricky to weigh yourself all the time because if you are doing everything right you don't see results you can get discouraged, tricky business.
ReplyDeleteP.S. I think you look great in all your pictures, don't be so hard on yourself :)
Thanks Amy! The scale is tricky... I used to skip the scale, knowing in a few days I'd drop the "weekend" pounds.. but that turned into skipping it for 1 week, then 2...
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